For those who want to see my shiner, here you go. For those of you who are wondering how Todd managed to resist hitting me for this long, stuff it. I did it myself with a shovel.
It’s not too bad! Sadly, I’ve had worse. (Tried to find the photo of the Florida car wreck aftermath that was my face, to no avail.)
Here it is the day after I did it.

And this morning. (Very brave of me to put up a post-wakeup, puffy eyes, no makeup photo, no?)

Uh . . . enjoy it, sickos.