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Archive for the ‘Holiday’ Category

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Thanksgiving Followup

Wednesday, December 2nd, 2009

So, Todd didn’t cry after the game. I know I promised Iron Bowl, Part II, but I am all out of witty comments. Here is the abridged version:

We left the game, and “borrowed” a couple of cokes. We hitched a ride back to our car with Ned’s mom, Gwen. We parked at Todd’s old Jr. High and I got a good laugh out of him on his old stomping grounds. We went to Iain and Noelle’s to watch the second half. We went home and pigged out on Thanksgiving dinner and went to bed REALLY early. We got up the next day and went to the park with Todd’s dad, Todd’s brother, Wade, and our niece, Luci. We played. We left and went bowling. Todd won. The Auburn bowling alley is pretty darn good people-watching, too.

We went back over to Iain and Noelle’s to watch the Georgia/Georgia Tech game, and I came close to killing Matt, because he kept on switching over to LSU/Arkansas. There were eight people there, and ten dogs. yes, I said TEN. Quint came too. He was nervous, what with all the butts to sniff and nudge, and the fact that Iain was cooking ribs, and a couple of the dogs got into the grease under the grill, so they smelled like ribs, and a little bitch named Lela didn’t like him one bit, and kept growling at him. There was Lela and her brother, who was well-behaved and so i can’t remember his name, and T’s puppy, Coden, and the four of them finally settled down on the couch with Lela’s Daddy Matt and me. A brown dog love fest. There was also Casey, Sammers, and Ginger, along with Bodhi (spelling?) and Omar. Wait. Maybe that’s nine. Or I’m forgetting a dog. Oh, Butters from next door! Ten!

They all slept around and begged ribs, and at one point, I thought they were gonna eat T and Matt for sure.

All in all, v. fun. Then we got home and slept late, and there were no kids there when i got up, because they went to Sunday School with my in-laws. Then we ate Cracker Barrel after church (which we didn’t go to, but we met the kids and in-laws after) and then we sat in Thanksgiving traffic on the way back to Atlanta.

(Mouse over a photo for the caption.)

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Posted in Auburn, Family, food, Football, Holiday, Life, Photography, Quint, Rollie, Tiller, todd, Travel | 2 Comments »

Thankful, Part II

Monday, November 30th, 2009

I really wanted to post about my weekend in Auburn, the Iron Bowl, seeing old friends, and Georgia surprisingly beating Tech. But I have had too much to do today to do the weekend justice. Instead, i will just give Thanksgiving picture love. . . .

Cousins
Leaf Hand-Holding Cousins

Malex
Leaf Dog

Dash
Leaf Crawling

Tiller
Leaf Throwing

Princess Visiting Puppy (Yes, she came up with that name on her own.)
Princess Visiting Puppy

Little Brave
Little Brave

Hope everyone had a wonderful and safe Thanksgiving.

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Posted in Dash, Family, Holiday, Home, Life, Photography, Rollie, Tiller | No Comments »

The Ghost Toys of Christmas Past

Thursday, November 19th, 2009

So, my online friend and fellow blogger, Melanie, wrote a really funny post about having to find a particular toy for her daughter for Christmas. Zhu Zhu pets?

I know that my mother is just waiting in the wings to laugh her butt off at me when I go through this v. same thing some Christmas soon. She is still bitter about the whole Cabbage Patch Kid shortage in the early 80s. Girls in Georgia, before Roberts sold out to Mattel or whomever, called these “Adoption Dolls.” They were sold in high-end toy shops, and they were ridiculously expensive. Never mind that my sister and I, living in GA, already had original, signed Xavier Roberts dolls. Two each, no less. That’s right, Annie Mouse and Sport Model were too good for just one $100 dollar craft doll each. Oh, no! We had to have the plastic ones too. Boy, those cabbage patch girls really didn’t smell very good. And I never loved the plastic mass-produced ones nearly as much. I know it is wrong to say that you love one of your children more than the others, and this is true in the adoption doll world, too. But I loved Minerva Vivian and Betsy Eunice, and even knock-off adoption doll, Stephanie Lynn (named her myself), much more than. . . hmm. . . what was her name again? Maybe Lisa will remember. Update: Just went and found her papers in my hope chest, along with all the girls. Ginger Minnie. That was her name.

Ginger Minnie, Cabbage Patch Kid

Ginger Minnie, Cabbage Patch Kid

Cecil, being Cecil, thought that he could get away with the knock-off Adoption Doll. And sure enough, I loved blond, green-eyed Stephanie.

Stephanie Lynn, the knock off

Stephanie Lynn, the knock off

Lisa’s blond, blue-eyed knockoff was Samantha. Minerva, a real Xavier Roberts, was big-boned, red-headed, freckled and green-eyed. Not the prettiest doll on the block, but my first real one, and I loved her.

My first real Xavier Roberts doll.

My first real Xavier Roberts doll.


Then there was Betsy Eunice – black-haired, green-eyed, and well-proportioned, just like Scarlett O’Hara in plush doll form!
My second, dark-haired beauty

My second, dark-haired beauty

And then there was Lisa’s Tiffany.

Oh, Tiffany. . . bless her heart.

I must dig Tiffany out of hiding. Lisa, where is Tiffany? We need to post a picture of Tiffany, particularly of Tiffany’s very strange legs. Preferably a picture of Tiffany naked. This is the most bow-legged adoption doll in creation. They also neglected, at Babyland General, to give Tiffany a waist. So, sad. All of the other adoption dolls, and their mothers, whispered about Tiffany behind their hands when she was carried into a room.

And then we made picket signs out of poster board, sticks from outside, and scotch tape, and proceeded to set up a “Mom and Dad, Please Quit Smoking” picket line in my parents’ bedroom, each adoption doll holding a sign. I can tell you that if that didn’t convince my parents to quit smoking, nothing will convince a parent to quit smoking except for their own decision to quit. We were quite the Carrie Nations. We also used to try to charge my Mom’s side of the family for cussing. Most four-letter words were ten cents. The big ones were a quarter. We loved it when my Uncle Charlie and Cousin Finley got together, because we were assured of a windfall when they came to town. I will never forget that one time, Finley came in and said, “Hell, Charlie, just give the damn kid a fuckin’ twenty!”

Anyway, as of this year, my kids want absolutely everything in sight, but they have not narrowed down their wants to one particular, hard-to-find item. Knock on wood. If you have kids, is there a particular must-have item this year? What special things are you getting your kids? And what special must-have items did you get as a kid? Do you have any funny stories of your parents or yourself staking out K-mart of Richway for that perfect toy?

Oh, and p.s.

You don't want to know what else I found in this hope chest i've had since middle school.

You don't want to know what else I found in this hope chest i've had since middle school.


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Posted in Atlanta, Family, Holiday, Humor, Life, Memories, Parenthood, Roswell, Syndicated | 9 Comments »

Time Warp

Thursday, November 5th, 2009

Things are so different now than they were when I was a kid, but then i am always surprised that some things stay the same.

Rollie: Indian name - Walks with Pumpkin

Rollie’s class went on a field trip to a farm. They did a hayride, and made corn husk dolls, and Rollie got off the bus wearing an Indian feather headband, and carrying a pumpkin. (Or Punk King, as he called them when he was little.) And, instant timewarp, it was like Alpharetta First United Methodist Kindergarten, 1978, all over again.

I am bummed I can’t find the picture of me in my indian headress and with paint on my face. I know I have it here somewhere. . . Mom?

I have to admit that I was surprised that they still do this. I would have thought that someone would have complained about how offensive it is for 6 year olds to dress up like Indians. Me? I remember that i just thought it was the most awesome thing ever. Hope Rollie felt it too.

I love a good time warp.

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Posted in Alpharetta, Atlanta, Cool Stuff, Education, Family, Health and Fitness, Holiday, Home, Humor, Life, Memories, Musings, Parenthood, Photography, Rollie, Tucker | 2 Comments »

A Halloween Story

Sunday, November 1st, 2009

Last night, we took the kids trick or treating, despite the misty rain, and the mud, and the fact that the Gators were still in the midst of kicking Georgia’s ass. Sometimes, it is better to just walk away and eat candy and drink beer.

Rollie was a mummy (Not that fun a costume to put together, and even worse to remove! Like the old school costume ideas, though.) and Tills was a cheerleader. We went to meet neighbors a couple of streets over for a neighborhood tradition. A family has always done a pinata before trick or treating. It started with just a family or two, but over the years, has ballooned to tons of neighborhood kids showing up to take a shot at the pinata. I think they even have two pinatas, one for the big kids and one for the little ones. So many people show up that I dropped candy off the day before to help out. The whole thing is a ball of candy frenzy, but so much fun. It gives the parents a chance to group, pour themselves a drink (everyone has a cup or a rolling cooler with them), chat while the kids wait in line for their turn to whack the pinata, and to check out all the costumes in the floodlights of the driveway. When the pinata finally cracks open, candy rains from the sky, and the scramble for booty begins. One mother in my neighborhood aptly referred to it as “like a scene out of Lord of the Flies.” I loved that book! Perhaps not for everyone, though.

After that, we all give our thanks and head around the loop to trick or treat. The bigger kids race from door to door, their parents yelling, “slow down! It isn’t a race! Wait for your sister! You’re going to trip over something cutting through a dark yard like that! Don’t ring that doorbell! Porch light off means they aren’t giving out candy!” The shrieks and yells carry through the night, echoing off the houses. The parents walk down the middle of the street, then weave to one side or the other, depending on which house the kids are going to. Occasionally, the kids stop at the parents to yell excitedly that a certain house gave a certain something awesome. Some houses have scary stuff – motion-activated sound machines or mummies and vampires that pop up when the kids approach the steps. One got Tiller so bad that she turned around and ran back across the yard, to the sound of myself and todd roaring in laughter. Parents drag coolers or wagons or push strollers (they make great drink transportation!) The little ones get tired about 3/4 of the way and start dragging and wanting up to be carried or in the wagon. (“Baby, Mama’s cooler’s in the wagon. You better keep walking.”) We finally finish the loop and head home, the kids wild-eyed and digging into their candy before we get there. We visit the old folks around us, which we should have done before going to the pinata, but damn it, Mummies are hard to wrap. The old folks make over the kids and the kids stumble over their words trying to explain everything that they saw, and who was dressed up as what.

Then you get home, and you let the kids have some candy. (Yes, we are terrible and limited their intake right before bed. We wash off mummy makeup and take off saddle oxfords and tights and tuck them into bed, visions of pumpkins and candy dancing in their heads.

Then we rummage through their candy, and pour ourselves a drink. Finally, we walk out into the carport to blow out the candles in the pumpkin and step on a pile of muddy shoes, twisting our ankle and bumping our head on the brick wall, our screams of agony resonating throughout the neighborhood under a Waxing Gibbous moon. We limp back to the couch with the help of our husband, who brings us a water, Ibuprofen, a bag of frozen fruit, and a beer. We prop our foot up, icing it and watching The Night of the Living Dead.

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Posted in Cool Stuff, Family, Football, Friends, Holiday, Humor, Life, Parenthood, Photography, Rollie, Tiller, todd, Tucker | 4 Comments »

Taking Off the Training Wheels

Tuesday, September 8th, 2009

In all the school speech hubbub of yesterday, I didn’t get around to posting what I really wanted to post: My baby boy learned to ride his bike without training wheels yesterday.

My mom told me that I started wanting to learn to ride my bike at age four. She said all the older kids were riding theirs, and I wanted to also. I don’t remember that, but I do remember riding my brown, orange, and yellow (it was the 70s!) Roadmaster down a short sloped driveway at a neighbor’s house, my dad holding the hard yellow seat behind me. I remember skinned knees, and no helmet. I remember exhilaration.

I tried teaching Rollie this spring. I took him over to a parking lot nearby, and it was a disaster. No one got hurt, but I was nervous, he was wobbly and frustrated, and it was hot as Hades. We did not last long on the asphalt, and we gave up.

So, Rollie had a play date at a friend’s house earlier this year and the little girl could ride with no training wheels. Rollie was interested again. We have no flat area to learn to ride bikes in our yard, so we have to take the bike somewhere else to teach him to ride. We have been, shall we say, less than proactive about doing so.

Rollie started asking us more often to teach him, but something always came up. Then yesterday, Todd told us all to pack up and we headed over to the local park. We took Tiller’s little bike, too. We strapped them both in their helmets. Rollie even wore his knee and elbow pads (overkill, as it turned out). Todd got Rollie on the bike, and we showed him how to set up the right pedal (he is right-handed), so that he could stand on his left foot while using his right foot to step on the high right pedal, thereby giving himself a sort of initial boost of speed. We told him that he had to pedal fast to keep going. We told him that he needed to put his feet down when he came to a stop, that he needed to remember to steer.

I sat on a curb and bit my fingernails.

Todd went to the opposite end of the parking lot with him, and then slowly they started. Todd held onto the back of the seat, just as my own father had thirty-plus years ago. I wondered if my Mom could even watch me learning. I watched as my firstborn sped up, and wobbled, and freaked out and put his feet down on the pavement. I heard Todd say, “Slow down, Buddy. I can’t keep up with you.”

I watched as they tried again. Rollie took off, and started a little faster, and he was wobbly, and the look on his face was one of pure terror, mirroring my own I am sure, and suddenly, i realized Todd was not holding him anymore, just running right back and to the left, arms creating a waiting safety net around Rollie’s sides, but not touching him. I heard Todd speaking to him, “You’re doing it all on your own, buddy. You’re doing it.”

Tiller rode in circles, training wheels flashing in the sun. Todd and Rollie got ready again at the end of the parking lot. Tiller straightened out and pumped her legs as fast as they would go, sparks almost coming off the training wheels, her bike leaning precariously to her side. Rollie started off from a low incline, picked up speed, then started pedaling furiously as he quickly moved away from Todd. Rollie was moving of his own energy. Todd was left in the dust, looking panicky. I was in a panic of my own, my heart in my throat. I yelled, “You’re doing it, Buddy! you’re doing it!” Tiller’s bike rattled and she toppled over, a slow motion, non-life-threatening wobble. Meanwhile, Rollie came to a shaky stop, feet dragging on the pavement, and I was completely torn. Tiller’s training wheel came right off the bike and rolled in a large circle, slowed, came to a stop, and fell over.

We all looked at each other in amazement.

Rollie had ridden a bike by himself, and was all pride and bluster. Tiller had ridden the wheels right off her bike.

It was a good day. I only wish I had gotten video of the baby that once came out of my vagina now riding a bike around on his own bottom and two legs, laughing and getting mad because we wanted him to slow down. It just happened so fast.

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Posted in Cool Stuff, Family, Holiday, Home, Humor, Life, Memories, Parenthood, Rollie, Tiller, todd | 1 Comment »

A Great Day

Saturday, September 5th, 2009

Storm Troopers and Sand People on Peachtree before noon. Listening to one of my favorite authors speak after a lunch over beer. Pouring myself the first Bloody Mary of the football season. Today is one of those stellar days.

Here’s hoping the Bulldogs keep my momentum going. . . .

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Posted in Atlanta, Cool Stuff, Family, Football, Georgia, Holiday, Life | No Comments »

Back With a Vengeance

Thursday, April 16th, 2009

Not keeping up well, am i? Well, we went to Blue Ridge (Morganton, actually) and had a lovely week at the cabin. While Todd and I unpacked, the kids and the dog ran around willy nilly on top of the mountain. The cabin is at the end of a road on a mountain, with only a few cabins around, so the kids could have free rein, and we didn’t have to worry about people or cars. They found sticks and climbed logs, and threw rocks, picked dandelions, and looked at bugs. They laid on a picnic table and watched the clouds. They yelled.

P4090060

Todd and I held down the fort, watching them from above on the porch, looking out over the blue ridge mountains, sipping drinks, and playing Scrabble. (A draw for the whole weekend.)

IMG_0469

That night, after dinner and putting on PJs, we had a clear night, so we pulled out the telescope and showed Tiller the moon. Rollie was not so impressed, but Tiller sat on Todd’s knee and said, “I see the moon, Mama. I see the moon.” Then she would raise her eye from the telescope and look up at the moon with her naked eye, as if trying to figure it all out.

P4080030

The next morning, Tiller and I continued the nature lessons with some birdwatching. Here she is with the Audubon bird guide. I love it when she picks up my big books and acts like she is reading them. (She is currently “reading” Anathem along with me.)

P4080039

The next day, we drove and found a park for a picnic and playing on the Toccoa River.

IMG_0454

Then we drove into McCaysville/Copper Hill for ice cream,

P4090050

model train watching,

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and state line straddling.

IMG_0460

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Rollie and I met this guy, but he scared Tills.

IMG_0461

When we got back to the cabin, we sat on the porch and rocked out to some tunes while having a snack. The following is a video of, I think, the kids explaining what will happen if their Uncle Mark gets into the Easter baskets. It makes little sense, but is funny, and also a good example of what every night at our dinner table is like. Note the manner in which the kids try to get their stories out so fast that they have to stop and gulp air every once in a while. Sometimes their stories sound like hyperventilation. Also note that by “story” i do not mean to imply that there is any plot.

That night, we roasted marshmallows. I like to make sure that each kid gets their fill of carcinogenic-covered marshmallow every few months.

P4090070

Friday, it rained ALL DAY LONG. I didn’t know the real meaning of Cabin Fever until that day. Todd and I started drinking Mimosas about ten and proceeded to lounge around in PJs all day long, reading and laying all over the couch with the kids while Rollie played XBox until his brain started melting out of his ears. Just a little.

P4090082

See what Quint is doing? That is pretty much all he did the whole time, except sometimes the location was a sunny spot on the porch, or my bed, or occasionally he would go outside and attempt to pee on every tree in North Georgia.

That night we had some slightly scary storms, wherein I looked out the window and trees were trying to be horizontal rather than vertical, and then i called my mom and sister every ten minutes to see if we were under a Tornado Warning.

Okay, there is more to this trip, but i have to go to the bathroom, and i think it will make a good second post for tonight or tomorrow. Like you’re still reading or something. . . .

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Posted in Family, Holiday, Life, Travel, Video | 8 Comments »

Merry Christmas

Tuesday, December 25th, 2007

Todd took this one last night at Christmas Eve Mayhem, which is what our Christmas Eves have become. We just open the doors and all the orphans come over, and now the orphans have kids, and they all run around and stay up late, and get hopped up on candy and cookies, and it’s crazy! And fun. And tiring.

p.s. Played Santa until 1:30 a.m. Fuck Victorian wooden dollhouses. Fuck Melissa and Doug. Long live plastic that never decomposes and looks terrible and will give the kids three eyes. At least I wouldn’t spend three hours putting the fucker together. Wine helped, though.

Posted in Family, Friends, Holiday, Memories | 1 Comment »

Jingle Cats

Thursday, December 20th, 2007

This just never becomes unfunny to me. My kids love it. I love the crappy production look of it – very 80s rock video. My cats are completely offended by it, but they better come around, because I see a video shoot in their near future.

Posted in Holiday, Humor | No Comments »

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