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Babyland

Sunday, January 15th, 2012

Todd took Rollie to Monster Jam last night and when Tills heard they were going, she was a little upset. So, my sister and I decided we’d take the day and drive to Cleveland to take her to Babyland General. (We took Dash, too. You know. To see if he’s gay or not.)

Now, neither of us had been there since we were little girls, and admittedly, we were pretty excited. We had “Adoption Dolls” as little girls, before Xavier Roberts sold to Mattel and they renamed them Cabbage Patch Kids, and they were like magic. It is funny now to think how all the moms and daughters of the 80s drank the kool-aid on this one: These dolls are really nothing much to look at. Some of them are damn ugly. (Lisa, I’m looking at Tiffany!) But there was something completely magical about them. I can still remember getting my first one (a knock-off named Stephanie.)

This is Lisa and Me, Christmas 1981. I am not sure if we got Stephanie and Samantha this Christmas, or if they just came downstairs with us on Christmas morning. (Yes, this was also the year we arrived in the future and got an Atari! And I got The Black Stallion Breyer horse. A magical Christmas, all in all.)

And here I am a month later, on my birthday, holding both of the girls before opening my gifts. Lisa and I played with these things So. Much.

And I can remember loving her, and wanting another! I remember going into the toy shop in downtown Alpharetta. (I forget what it was called – maybe the Indian Trading Post? It had an old cigar store Indian out front.) I would go in that shop, and look at all the “real” adoption dolls they had in there. I think part of the magic was that there were so many different colors and combinations of eye and hair color, and they had real baby clothes on, and they were given real first and middle names, just like real babies, and when you adopted one, you got a real birth certificate, with baby footprints and your name signed on it, and their birthdays and everything.

Magic.

So, in the end, i ended up with one knock-off, who was my first, and whom I loved just as much as the next two. Stephanie Lynn was later joined by Minerva and Betsy. (I think those were their names. Guess I need to check the birth certificates.) I suppose i remember Stephanie’s name because i named her myself. The other two came with laminated tags on their hands that had their names Sharpied on.) Minerva was a redhead, and Betsy (?) a raven-haired beauty.

Anyways, I digress, but the point of all this is to say that being a parent is hard and sometimes infuriating, sometimes scary, sometimes sad. But sometimes it is wonderful. Taking your child to do something you did as a child, or teaching them to fish, or seeing them touched by magic that you can still remember and feel? That is one of the most special parts of parenthood. Yesterday was one of those days.

: I think I can speak for Lisa when i say that our favorite part was the displays of old cabbage patch kids. (Or, as we called them growing up, “Adoption Dolls.”) Some of them were worth $15,000!

: In the preemie nursery.

: This is a creepy stuffed nurse doll.

: Is this the one?

: And then me and the kids. I teared up a few times.

: We had to get pictures. Lisa with the kids. It was very emotional for Lee and I.

: T and D playing with puppies. It’s not just babies!

: Tiller making a wish in the wishing well. (Proceeds go to charity.)

: So many babies! How can a girl choose?

: Tiller and I looked and looked for a light brown-haired baby with green eyes. That’s what Tills wanted. And then she saw this brown-eyed baby girl, and the search was over.

: The one! This is her!

: And they gazed into each other’s eyes, and she knew it was right.

: Tiller introduces her new baby to her Aunt Lisa.

: Lisa and T with baby, right after Tills picked her out.

: Thank god they had this car track for Dash to play with. He was bored in about ten minutes. Guess he’s gonna be straight, no matter how much Lisa and I try to gay him out.

: So many decisions!

: Babies in the cabbage patch.

: They did lots of checking of heartbeats, forceps, “Imagicillin,” and “Easyotomies.”

: These “Doctors” couldn’t have been out of high school. How high do you have to get to work at Babyland General? It cracked me up.

: Tiller is in the purple with the pink thing in her hair. She watched for about 15 minutes. They had her complete attention.

: Tiller with Aunt Lisa, after adopting Caitlyn.

: Looks a whole lot like South Fork. They really should have a JR lookalike greet you at the door.

: Babyland General sign. Much confusion with Tills over the stork bringing the baby lore. She’s like, “I thought mamas and daddies made babies in tummies. . . “

Tags: Adoption Dolls, Babyland General, Cabbage Patch Kids, childhood, Cleveland GA, Growing Up in Georgia, Xavier Roberts
Posted in Alpharetta, Dash, Family, Georgia, Gifts, Lisa, Memories, Mushy, Parenthood, Tiller | 2 Comments »

One Eyed Willie’s Treasure Hunt

Monday, October 10th, 2011

The week before her birthday, Tiller was a show dog in the Kindergarten Circus. She was v. cute, even though she had some trouble jumping through the hoop. She can be less than coordinated at times. I thought she might cry when she fell (twice), but she got up smiling and tried again. I was very proud of her. I also am very proud of the fact that I sewed ears and a tail, which is why i included it in the birthday post. This is my blog, after all, even if I've been neglecting it.

So, about Tiller’s birthday. She turned six on Saturday. SIX. Hard for me to fathom. Tiller wanted to have a scavenger hunt party, and we had just watched The Goonies as a family, so I made it a One-Eyed Willie’s Treasure Hunt.

Every kid got a copy of One Eyed Willie’s treasure map when they arrived. (We also had pirate cupcakes, Twinkies and Baby Ruths. I also bought Rocky Road, but totally forgot to pull it out, which is a good thing, because i was worried about angry mobs of parents attacking my house after they found out how much sugar I gave their kids.)

Love that some of the kiddos' moms took it upon themselves to dress them like pirates. Fun!

Margaret and Leelee accompanied their boys to the party. Um, they don't have boys together. They have their own boys. With their husbands.

The kids are waiting to hear the next clue. Todd wrote the clues and i wish I could copy them down here - they were awesome. They all rhymed.

Kate won the award for cutest pirate hat and sash.

Children are like sheep. One would think they had the answer and run off yelling, I know where the next clue is! and all the other sheep would follow, and Todd would still be standing there finishing the clue. And they would have the wrong location. Every time.

One of R's teachers does this thing in class where they have to decode an encrypted message to figure out what to do that day in class. So, Rollie helped us create one, and the older kids had to decode that clue for the younger ones. This is Rollie and Milo working with pencil and paper to decode the clue.

. . . with the help of the older twins, Leah and Sydney. Syd needs snack to help her think.

The girls use the map to figure out the next clue.

The girls (Matilda, Scarlett, Liliana - i think- Sydney, and Kate) working together!

Todd, the Cluemaster, about to be stampeded by children with the Ghoulish Garden clue.

The girls listen to clues intently. Boys mostly push each other and climb trees while they are being read.

Tiller blowing out her candle as Sydney and Chloe look on.

Me and the girl after she blew out her candles. Let's talk about the ponytail for a minute. Yeah, there's just one. That's her new thing. It cracks me up. It also reminds me of Natalie Wolfe and Elizabeth Wilcoxin wearing ponytails in middle school and putting their Swatches around them. That just kills me.

Not a great photo, but a rare moment where the kiddos are lovingly touching one another. Had to be captured.

Disappointed we didn't get Cousin Luci in there, but here are Tiller and R. with Baby Dash. He's not really a baby anymore.

Oh! There's cousin Luci!

Josie hearts cupcakes.

So does Chloe. I deduce.

Leah liked the rings from the treasure.

Syndey, wearing her beads from the treasure chest.

Sydney loves balloons!

Chuck and Cass helped us keep track of all the kiddos.

These two grew up together in Auburn. Always fun to have the 2nd generation at a party.

Okay, actually, Nathan listened closely to the clues. . . .

Treasure Hunters in a group by the tree. Surprisingly, the biggest hit from the pirate treasure? Balloons.

So, then we opened gifts. Tills got Ramona from Uncle Lyle and Aunt Denise!

My little nephew Dash, waiting to see the presents.

These three are crazy floor rolling laughers!

Normally, i wouldn't include such an unflattering picture of myself, but dang! I never think Tiller and I look much alike, but evidently, there is some resemblance. When we are flapping our gums.

She got pretty excited about Littlest Pet Shop. We have a LOT of Littlest Pet Shop. Like, nuclear levels.

And later that night, Tiller stayed up too late, and then fell asleep on my chest during the Georgia game. So sweet.

Happy birthday to my little girl. I love you very much, Tiller Badiller, Mac and chiller, Saspariller, Thriller from maniller!

– Your Loving Mama

Tags: birthday, One-Eyed Willie, Tiller's 6th Birthday
Posted in Family, Friends, Lisa, Memories, Parenthood, Rollie, Tiller, todd | 3 Comments »

Lost Tooth

Sunday, September 25th, 2011

Lost Tooth

Originally uploaded by Dogwood Girl

Tiller lost her first tooth this morning. Age 5. Sept. 25, 2011. My husband also turned 40 today. I have a 40-year-old husband and both my babies are not babies any more.

Cue Wilco . . .

Tags: Lost Teeth, Tooth Fairy
Posted in Beauty, Home, Life, Parenthood, Tiller, todd | No Comments »

What’s In a Name?

Saturday, September 24th, 2011

“Mama?” Tiller said, putting her head on my shoulder as we sat on the couch, her watching Mermaidia and me reading a book.

“Yes, Baby?” I said, turning to look at her, eye to eye.

“What’s your name?”

“Anne. My name is Anne.”

“What’s your other name?”

“You mean my middle name?”

“Yeah. Your middle name.”

“My middle name is Dunstan.”

“Huh?!”

“Dunstan. Anne Dunstan Palmer.

“What’s Dunstan?”

“It was my Grandma’s maiden name. Her last name, before she was married. Like mine was Palmer before I married your Daddy. She was Vivian Arenda Dunstan.”

“Oh.”

She sat thinking for a second.

“So, she was my great grandmother.”

“Yes. Yes, she was. Your Grandma Palmer’s mother. She died before you were born, though. But you would have loved her. And she would have loved you very, very much.”

“How come?”

“Because she and I loved each other very, very much. She was so much fun. She taught me to play cards, and Sorry, and build card houses, and to dance the Charleston. She liked to watch The Price is Right with me, and I Love Lucy. And she had the best laugh ever.”

“I wish I could have met her.”

“I do, too, baby. I do, too.”

Amazing that talking to my baby girl about my Grandma can make her seem like she is almost here. I can almost imagine her sitting here with us right now. And it sure does make me miss her, even almost 20 years later. We loved each other very, very much.

Tags: Dunstan Family, Parenthood, Vivian Arenda Dunstan
Posted in Family, Genealogy, Memories, Mushy, Parenthood, todd | 2 Comments »

A Mind of Their Own

Friday, September 23rd, 2011

“MOOOOOOM!!!!!” I heard from the basement. Rollie was clomping up the stairs, with his pants down around his ankles.

Me: “Uh, yes?”

R: “Mom, I need to change my underwear and pants!”

Me: “Oh, no. What happened?”

R: “Well, I was trying to aim for the toilet, but when I peed, it went straight down in my pants and underwear and everywhere!”

Me: “Okay, well, those things happen. Just put those in the dirty clothes and go change. It’s okay.”

Tiller, chiming in: “Did Rollie pee in his pants?!”

Rollie: “I didn’t do it! My penis did it on its own!”

Me: “Well, they do sometimes have a mind of their own.”

Posted in Humor, Parenthood, Rollie, Tiller | 1 Comment »

The Only Thing You Can Count On

Wednesday, August 10th, 2011

So, the first thing you should know is that the Tooth Fairy is susceptible to strep throat, just like the rest of us. In fact, R’s Tooth Fairy seems to have come down with it at the same precise time that I did. Rollie lost another tooth on Monday night (after he went to bed, of course, prompting me to get up off the couch and deal with blood and teeth and find the damn tooth pillow while swallowing felt like eating glass). I warned him that there was a chance she wouldn’t know that night that he had lost a tooth, since it was so late, and that she might not show. Well, she didn’t show last night either.

Rollie’s Tooth Fairy sucks. Hopefully, she will get her shit together and make an appearance this evening.

Now that we have that out of the way, let’s discuss this whole back-to-school thing. Yes, my county in GA went back to school. On August 8th. Yes, that August 8th, the one that is a full month before I used to go to school back in the olden days.

R. started second grade. I am the parent of a second grader. When I say it, it sounds like I am talking about some person I don’t even know. Who let me be responsible for a 2nd grader? Shoot, I still can’t believe they let me and Todd walk out of Northside with, not one, but TWO of these creatures. We just got in the car and drove off with them! No certificate or license or anything!

And the Tills. . . the sweet baby girl, Tiller. Tills started Kindergarten on Monday.

The first day was rough. When I left her classroom the teacher was trying to get a handle on the new students and calling for a translator. Tiller was sitting at her desk alone, in tears. (I may have shed a tear or two myself.) Our school gained a ton of new students through redistricting, many whose parents don’t speak English. We gained so many students that they hadn’t even hired a new teacher for the new Kindergarten class Tiller is in, so she has a sub this week. (Rumor has it the new teacher, who lives in our neighborhood and is a friend, starts tomorrow.) Not the perfect start to the week, but the sub is a retired veteran K teacher, and by the second day, she had that ship righted and set on a course.

Rollie has a male homeroom teacher for the first time. I am interested to see how his mostly-male class responds to having a man teaching them. Already, he seems like he is very active in his teaching, which i think these wild boys need. They had math class outside the first day!

Another change this year? The kids are in aftercare. I decided that i was ready to go back to work full-time, or at least take on more hours contracting. (Wink wink, nudge nudge – shoot me an email if you have the hookup on a dream job you think might be a good fit for me. You know – flexible, interesting, challenging, and financially rewarding! Is that so much to ask?)

So, starting next week, I am going to be looking for more work in earnest. I have been spoiled and lucky to have great, near-constant teleworking experiences for the last eight years, but i am ready to add more work to my plate. I feel like this is a brand new chapter in my life. My babies are not babies anymore. I am not a “new mom.” Wrapping my head around this has been pretty wild. I didn’t realize how much of my life revolved around keeping two kids alive for six and eight years! But they don’t need me quite as much as they did even two years ago, and I know it. I need to find other things to put my energies into. I have taken the PTA newsletter off my plate this year.

I am still putting together the quarterly Evansdale Education Foundation newsletter, though, and serving on the organizing board. That has been a very rewarding experience. Have a bunch of money bags lying around? Please donate to the foundation here! (Or just look at the newsletter to see some of the awesome stuff we funded this year – a new EIP teacher for the school, and gifted certification and guided math training for teachers. We raised about $50,000 in our first year. Amazing, since it started out as about 15 people sitting around every Sunday night at someone’s house, trying to figure out how to sustain and improve quality of education at the elementary school.) Whoa. Digression.

So, I was worried that the day, with aftercare, would just be too much for my five-year-old girl. But Tiller LOVED her first day of school. I thought she would be happy to see me when I picked them up that first day, and she was. She came walking out of the cafeteria and saw me, cracked a big smile, exclaimed, “mama!” and ran full speed into my arms! And then I said for her to get her bag and she burst into tears and said she didn’t want to go yet. I am glad that she is going to like it there and that I won’t feel bad about them being there all day, but I would be lying if I said there wasn’t a little tiny piece of me that wishes that she was going to miss our lunches and errands as much as I will.

And of course, Rollie was all, “Mom! Why did you pick us up so early?!” (It was after five.) “I was playing dodgeball!”

I missed you, too, Buddy.

So, i think this is a big year for us, and will be a big adjustment. But I’m starting to see that most change is good, and even if it isn’t, I might as well embrace it, because it is really the only thing you can count on in this life.

Still, how can this:

And this:

Become this?

We will make you love us and then leave you, Mama.

We are going to make you love us and then leave you, Mama.

Tags: First Day of School
Posted in Education, Family, Life, Mushy, Parenthood, Rollie, Tiller, Work | 2 Comments »

I think they missed us.

Wednesday, May 18th, 2011

Uncle Mark took some shots of the kids while we were in Mexico. I love this one:

But then, I also like this one:

This one:

And this one:

Nice to see they missed us while we were gone.

Tags: By Mark, Lisa
Posted in Family, Parenthood, Photography, Rollie, Tiller | 2 Comments »

A Mother’s Dilemma

Saturday, March 12th, 2011

I read an interesting article this morning on parenting.com, about girls and sports. The blogger obviously has two very athletic girls who like to play sports; she bemoans the fact that society doesn’t seem to be able to reconcile beauty and unisex athleticism. Interesting, but not exactly a groundbreaking discussion.

But what about this? What if you are a fairly athletic mom, who grew up playing sports, excelled at many of them, loved playing them, and have a firm understanding of how integral a part they played in the confident adult you have become? What if you want that same confidence and love of exercise for your daughter?

And what if your daughter couldn’t care less about it?

My son loves sports, loves competition, and is pretty athletic, picking things up quickly, with great hand-to-eye coordination. My daughter just doesn’t have that same ingrained sense of competition or love of sport.

She likes to sing. And dance. And color. And sing. There is a lot of singing.

When I put her on a soccer field, she is oblivious to the ball. She is looking for dandelions in the grass, and perfecting twirling in circles as fast as possible. We say, “Just go out and have a good time.” She says, “I hate soccer.” I am making her play out the season, hoping it will click one day, and knowing it probably won’t, but taking her to the game anyway, because she signed up to be on a team, and at least she is learning something about follow-through and being part of a team, and obligation.

I want her to do some physical activity every season, to learn to make exercise a part of her life. We have done dance. (Suprisingly, she hated it. Evidently, baby girl doesn’t want someone to tell her how to dance.) We will put her on swim team this summer. If nothing else, she gets cheap swim instruction and a practice with friends every day. If she doesn’t want to swim in meets, we won’t make her.

I have thought that maybe she might enjoy karate, or something like that, more than team sports or ball sports.

But there is the dilemma: Am i trying to force something on her that is not in her nature? First and foremost, i am interested in her physical health. Am I wrong to force her to try different sports and activities, in hopes that something will catch her interest? I certainly don’t try to subvert her love of art and music, nor would i want to – they are an important part of who she is. I feel that I nurture those, too, but is it wrong to want to make sure she is physically active and healthy? Or am I doing more damage than good?

What is a mother to do?

And, God forbid, what if my daughter ends up wanting to be a cheerleader? Because, you know that is probably what will happen.

Tags: Raising a Daughter, Sports
Posted in Family, Musings, Parenthood, Tiller | 22 Comments »

The Bear Went Over the Mountain

Wednesday, February 9th, 2011

Rollie was in his first grade musical last week. Okay, I don’t like to brag, but he was the lead in the first grade musical.

I know what you’re thinking. . . where did that come from? He didn’t get that from his mama, that’s for sure. And you’re right. His teacher told me she wanted to challenge him. He had to memorize a lot of lines for the thing. I think it had little to do with stage presence, dreams of being a star, or singing ability. I think it just probably had to do with height and ability to read well.

In truth, when i found out he was the lead, my first reaction was, “oh, GAWD.” I hate musicals, drama, etc. I mean, I’ll go see Shakespeare, but I have never been a theatrical person, had any desire or aspirations to act or dance or sing. I have a terrible voice. I am not creative. I think musicals, for the most part, are stupid. Sorry, Glee fans.

I had people come up to me and say, “Hey, Rollie is THE BEAR! Congratulations! and then look at me, as if ready to gauge my reaction. (At first, my reaction was, “So?” Because I hadn’t read that sheet that comes home with instructions on how to dress your child for the play, and with the lines and parts. So I didn’t really know that the bear was, like, a big deal.)

I have to admit, when my kid is chosen for a role like this, sometimes I sense a bit of jealousy. It sounds crazy, and maybe it is my imagination, but in a way, a role like this is LOST on someone like me. It is ironic, then, that my son is chosen for the lead on something like this. I could care less. But there are moms out there who would LOVE to do this thing, who would make a beautiful costume for their kid, and go through trial runs of makeup, and sew, for fuck’s sake. I am not that mom.

All that being said, when his teacher framed it as “challenging him” i was glad that she did it. he had to work hard to memorize his lines, and I had to get out of my comfort zone just to watch him in the performance, so i guess it was challenging all around. And working up to the day of the play, i became increasingly nervous for him. He is so smart and charming, when he wants to be. And when he doesn’t. . . well, he is going to be the person he wants to be. To the point where I could have seen him saying, five minutes before the play, “I don’t feel like being the bear.” Or, “I’m not wearing the ears.” Or just having a meltdown and kicking things and crying. I was a nervous wreck, and mostly just trying to be upbeat and excited, to mirror excitement for him.

And it seemed to work. Todd and I were in the crowd, with his parents, my parents, my sister, Dash, and Tiller. The lights went down and the whole thing went off without a hitch. (Well, there was some kind of whispered squabble for a second, between him and the owl, but it passed quickly and nearly imperceptibly.) All of the animals made it up and back down the mountain in one piece. Dash clapped with glee throughout the whole thing. The cast sang in sweet unison, and hugged and held hands, and I marveled at the sight of these kids I know in real life becoming their animal and embracing their parts, even if they just had one line, and making them their own.

And after, when the bear and the other animals were taking their bow, i was proud. And I thought, huh, maybe I DO like musicals.

Rollie, just hours before showtime.

Behind the Music: The Making of Da Bear

John, Greta and . . One of the twins. (Dang it.)

Principal with Beautiful Scenery

Rollie as Da Bear. I was so nervous and proud to watch him up on that stage.

The Bunny Twin (Leah? Syd?)

The Quail Twin?

The cast of the first grade play: The Bear Went Over the Mountain.

Rollie with castmates Skye and Katie

A closeup of Mama's little bear.

Rollie and Grace had two of the biggest parts in the play (she was the owl). they had to sing together and hold hands, and they did a great job. Only one little sec where I thought Rollie might get mad and push her or something. Have you seen Black Swan? I guess these performances can be real pressure cookers. Other than that, they did GREAT!

Syd and Leah: I believe they are a Quail and a Bunny.

Rollie, with fans Dash and Tiller, Post-Performance

One other thing I forgot to mention, which falls under the “family lore” category. Growing up, when my sister and i were young teens, and allowed to watch things like PG 13 movies, we often watched movies as a family. For some reason, my father, completely uncomfortable with the blossoming womanhood of his two daughters, would sing, “The Bear Went Over the Mountain” at the top of his voice during sex scenes in movies. To this day, i cannot separate the song “The bear went over the mountain” from thoughts of my father making last ditch attempts at shielding his innocent daughters from the likes of Tom Cruise getting it on with Kelley McGillis in Top Gun. It cracks me up to this day.

Tags: Education, The Bear Went Over the Mountain
Posted in Beauty, Dash, Education, Family, Memories, Parenthood, Rollie | 3 Comments »

Honors Day

Tuesday, February 1st, 2011

Rollie had his first Honor’s Day this morning. (It was mine and Todd’s too.) So cute to see all of the kids his age, and have their names called out and see them walk across the stage, shake the Principal’s hand, and then look out to find us.

Also a little bittersweet, because my first baby is a baby no more.

Here is the proud little guy, holding up his awards. He took the unibomber jacket off for the actual ceremony and walking across the stage. Small victories.

Tags: Honor's Day
Posted in Parenthood, Rollie | No Comments »

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