One very observant reader and friend of Dogwood Girl came across a very funny oops on Dogwood Girl, which I thought I would share with you all. Such highbrow readers will certainly find this humorous.
Hazards of Non-Obvious Line Breaks
You would think that with content like that, I would be getting way more hits. Thanks for the huge laugh, Jasonaut.
I read a pretty good amount, and watch some sappy movies, and listen to a lot of moving music. Nothing moved me like the day that I read this guy’s blog last year. I can’t remember how I came across it, but since then, his readership has spread like wildfire. He and his daughter were even in People magazine recently.
I have been meaning to mention it on Dogwood Girl, because I think about him, and his wife, and his daughter every single day. It reminds me that when i am having a crappy day, I should shut the fuck up. And on days like today’s post, it reminds me how very lucky I am.
He is really amazing, and at the same time, so very real. His favorite band is the Silver Jews. He loves his robot. He dresses his daughter in a shirt that reads, “Your Favorite Band Sucks.” He says “fuck” a lot. He could be me, or you. There, but for the grace of God, go all of us.
Actually, if you have never read it before, you should start here. But get the hankies ready. I haven’t seen anything so torturously beautiful and nightmarish in ages. I hope that i will never know his grief or the bittersweet feeling he must get every time he looks at his daughter. I hope that I never forget that it could be me.
Everyone knows that i have some serious doubts about our public education system in Georgia. I just don’t have a lot of faith in it, but that is based mostly on my own experience as a Georgia student over. . . well, many years ago now. I definitely felt that I had to give it a try, and see how my kids would fare at the elementary school we have chosen. So far, i am mostly happy with the school – Parent involvement is high, there do not seem to be any discipline issues of note, and there has been zero violence at the school. That being said, when I do post my thoughts on Dogwood Girl, it will most likely be something negative, as the impetus for my posts is usually what i term Pissed-Off-edness.
So, the latest installment: Valentine’s Day is coming up. Remember Valentine’s Day? Yep, it was pretty horrible back in school. All those people, making it very clear who is popular and who isn’t, all in glaring red, pink, white and lacy detail. But go back farther. Yep, to Pre-K and Kindergarten. Even first grade. Before cliques. Before Mean Girls and Queen Bees. Before Dumb Boys who always like the same predictable bubbly blonde. . . Yeah, you are right. That last part never existed. They always like the blonde. Even my own traitorous man cub likes the predictable blonde chick.
I digress and make this about me. This is not about me, this is about Valentine’s Day and public school education.
I asked the teacher how the children could prepare for Valentine’s Day at school. Would they need to make their own Valentine’s day box? No. But she did request that they not address their Valentines to their friends. They should just sign their name to the cards. It would make it easier that way.
Huh? So, basically, they (the teachers?) don’t want to deal with the hassle of making sure that the right Valentine gets to the right kid. Is it just me, or is that dumb as Paula Abdul? (It is probably me. I did get my period for Groundhog Day, which can make one a little pissy.)
How does it make sense to dissuade the kids from writing their friends’ names on the Valentine’s Day cards? Seems to me that 20 four-and-five year olds spending an evening sitting with their parents and learning to write out the letters in each of their friends’ names might be a good exercise: In penmanship, in letter recognition, in spelling, in spending time with their parents in one-on-one instruction, in thoughtfulness, and in good manners!
I can see that it could be a little time-consuming to go through all the cards and make sure they get to the correct student when most of the kids can’t read. But mightn’t that be a decent teaching exercise? And not to make this all about my kid, because I realize different kids are at different levels, but my kid can read, write, and spell. This is an awesome activity for my kid’s reading and writing level. Should my kid be brought down to the level of other kids who can’t, just because it might be a little extra work for the educators? (Which it wouldn’t, because my kid could totally match up his friend’s name on the card with the same name on their little mailbox.)
Yeah, you guessed it. We are addressing our Valentine’s Day cards. I’m not going to dumb down an everyday task, something that will teach my child, just because it will make his teacher’s life easier at the expense of common sense and etiquette.
Signed,
Bitch Mother
So, I had slacked a little in my running over the holidays. I was just a little burned out after training for the half marathon that I ran on Thanksgiving. And then Christmas came along, and family, and stress eating, and mom’s buckeyes, and, well, it turned into a free-for-all of sloth and gluttony. After the New Year, I meant to get back on a regular schedule of exercise and decent eating, and I did, about halfway through January. (Okay, two thirds.)
I realized the other day after doing a run on the treadmill that it wasn’t just getting back into the exercise that was making me hurt; it was my old shoes. I think you are supposed to replace running shoes something like every 500 miles, or 4-6 months. Um. . . .uh-oh. I had been using the same shoes for over a year. What finally clued me in was the rather large PIECE OF PLASTIC GOUGING THROUGH THE CLOTH IN THE HEEL OF MY SHOE AND INTO MY ACTUAL HEEL. I am pretty quick on the uptake, don’t you know? That combined with my propensity for frugality, resulted in me almost never buying new shoes.
Very, very, very rarely, parenthood and cool coincide. When I say “rare,” I mean, endangered species rare.
But the folks at Paste hit the nail on the head with this one.
I am so buying a copy and playing the playlist for the kiddos.
| You Are Sun |
 You have a past history of being secretive and deceptive. You’re the type of person who will protect yourself at all costs. While you can be crafty when you need to, you are usually giving, friendly, and likable. You truly care for other people, and you are very sensitive. People tend to underestimate you. You seem like a fragile flower, but you’re not. You are gutsy and clever. You have a way of getting what you want without anyone noticing. |
Okay, I messed around with themes and gave Dogwood Girl some new Duds. I am pretty sure I messed up my RSS feed in the process. So, if you are having trouble with any part of Dogwood Girl, let me know. If you lost the feed, please resubscribe. (Mom, that means you need to click that little link over there that says, “Subscribe.”)
Recently missed questions in trivia:
Travel: Out of the three major airports serving the New York City area, which one is the smallest?
TV Bonus Question: In the first five seasons of American Idol, who were the five runners-up? (You only have to come up with four.)
TV: What law drama had an episode with a Podiatrist who refused to explain why a severed head was found in his bag?
Know the answer?
Seems that the kinks are worked out and i have a working blog again. Please let me know if you see anything funky, though.
Boy, i have a lot of catching up to do. But probably not today. Today is for me. 37.
Todd and I have really been recycling like crazy this year, and it is amazing how much we have reduced the amount of crap in the trash. I get absolutely giddy when I fill up my composting bin and take it out and dump it on the pile. I know. Glamorous and exciting life I lead here.
It is also amazing how annoyed i am starting to get with packaging that can’t be recycled. The packaging on Christmas morning was just disgusting. Can’t someone figure out a way to recycle that thin plastic glass-like window stuff in toy boxes? What about the detestable dark gray or black rectangle doodads that protect the cardboard from the very annoying plastic-coated doodadders that tie dolls and toys into the cardboard boxes? The inventor of those two items should be shot, just on principle. Kids toys should rattle around in their boxes like they did when I was a kid! No one should need a damn sledgehammer and crowbar to open a monster truck or a Dora.
Anyway, I thought my friend Dan’s wife came up with a great idea: Homemade, reusable fabric gift bags. Not that I would in any way be capable of making one of these bags, but for those crafty types out there (Nikki?), thought you might be interested.
Also, if i used one, my dead grandma Palmer would rise right up out of her grave, walk all the way here from Savannah, and whack me over the head with her purse, just for thinking of robbing my children of the joy of ripping open some gift paper at Christmas.