Looking for something good to read? My dear friend Vanessa wrote a really cool short story and it has been published in a modern horror anthology called Read by Dawn, Volume III. Go ahead and click on that link and buy a copy. (I edited the story for Vanessa, so I can tell you, it’s really, really good!) You’ll get a great bunch of stories by authors you haven’t read before, and you’ll be supporting a girl who is following her dream.
Who Knew This Golden Girl Fan Had a Heart of Such Darkness?
August 4th, 2008This Cracks Me Up
August 3rd, 2008And it will you, too, if you have ever done a road trip with kids and had to go through a drive-through.
Vanessa, at this point, you should put your fingers in your ears, start humming the Bear Went Over The Mountain, and stop reading: Yes, I let my kids have fast food. Call DFACS.
Thanks, Dorothy!
Because Steph Brought Up Potty Training And We Won’t Be Outdone!
August 2nd, 2008Concerning Dagny, Steph and Doug’s little girl, and her fellow October birthday girl, Tiller, we are also on the Potty Train. I just got completely fed up with all things diaper – Changing them, smelling them, buying them. We bought a buttload of undies (pun intended) – Hello Kitty, Dora, etc. At first she was resistant, and at this point, she is peeing on the potty regularly, but we are having poop problems. She comes to us and says “I want to poop on the potty.” We check her and she has already pooped in her undies. We tell her poop goes in the potty. She cries and says, “But i want to poop on the potty.” We say, “You already pooped in your pants!” She falls on the ground and kicks her legs and flails around on the ground like a fish out of water. Repeat at least once a day, sometimes twice.
I know that sooner or later she will get it, but so far, we got nothin.’ We’re sticking with it, though, because as soon as we are off diapers, we are also going to stop getting the stupid plastic Kroger bags that we currently use to dispose of dirty diapers, and instead, we’re gonna be all green, with cute totes to take to the grocery store.
That’s what I call parental incentive to stick with potty training. It’s all about the cute bag. Like this bitchin’ number made by our friend Nikki in Seattle. She is very crafty, that Nikki. . . .
Sam
August 1st, 2008
Today is one of those days that makes me angry with God, if there is one. It is one of those days that makes me think there probably isn’t a God, and that we are all just ants in an anthill, amidst a field of anthills, and there are cows walking all over the field stepping on anthills left and right, and it is a complete fluke as to whether we will have our anthill stepped on today.
This is Sam. Sam lost his fight with brain and spine cancer this morning.
I didn’t know Sam as well as I wish I knew Sam. Sam called my dog “sock” even though he knew that wasn’t his name. I liked that about Sam. Sam always seemed like he was so happy to see me. He always asked about my kids and remembered their names.
He was one of those people that you meet and immediately like, one of the ones that lights up a room with their bright personality, who instantly made you feel like you knew them forever, and whom always made you feel included. I mentioned in another post that something made me think of Ross C. the other day; it was Sam that made me think of Ross. I was trying to think of how to describe Sam’s special brand of happy that came with him everywhere. Sam had that same something that Ross has that made you want to be his friend and that made you feel special just by being around him. Sam had that something that made you feel like you were a better person just by having been around him for a few minutes.
Sam was only 31. Sam was one of the Auburn folks, a group of people that I make fun of left and right, but that I am so very blessed to have in my life. Sam was a husband and a dad to two little ones, and I am so very sad for his family and friends today, because I will miss him and i didn’t even know him that well. I can’t imagine how much they will miss him.
Even as sad as this makes me, and as confused and sick as his passing makes me, it also makes me think that maybe there is a God. Only a God could create so wonderful a soul, so bright a light in humanity. In the same way that I look at the multitude of flowers and plants and trees just in my backyard alone, knowing that they couldn’t have been created out of nothing, I think that Sam did not come to us out of a vacuum, and that he is somewhere now, somewhere that i can’t understand, but that I know in my heart must exist, a special place where he will be a joy for eternity, and where if we are very, very good, we will get to sit and talk to him again one day.
November 11, 1989: Two Memories Converge, and Jason B., In All Probability, Shows Us the Depths of His Nerdiness
July 31st, 2008Kite Chronicles, aka “Mealby” put up a fond memory about an REM show in Macon and how she missed it. Here’s where my memory picks up as hers was obviously drowned out by copious amounts of alcohol:
“Finishing where you left off, i went to this show with Jason and Evan. Evidently, my parents smoked crack while i was in high school and let me go to Macon and get a motel room with two guys for a show. We were also joined in said room by one of the Bells – matt or pat, weren’t those their names? And another guy – Craig? Keith? Something like that.
Anyway, we went to the show, had a great time, and when we get to the motel, Va’s car pulls up, the back door opens, and out spills Camille and Mike, completely blitzed out of their minds, giggling and barely able to stand, and Va gets out of her driver’s door, looking SUPER PISSED.
From there, all i remember is laughing my ass off.”
I made the show, but can’t find the ticket stub. I know it’s in the bottomless pit somewhere. Curiously, though, while looking through the pile for the homecoming pics in my earlier posts, i came across a ticket stub from two nights later:
The big question is: Jason B, where is the Macon lighter????! Picture please. It was red, right? Also, jason, since you are the resident nerd. Wasn’t this Fox show the one where they played all of Murmur and all of Green from start to finish? Or am i confused?
Please Go to the Bathroom and Pee Before Reading This If You Went To High School With Me and You Have Incontinence Issues
July 31st, 2008
Since we’re talking about prom dresses and I’m still biding my time until the vampires return, I dug up some old dance pictures from high school.
I already posted the one from yesterday – That shimmering pink number was, in Natalie’s expert opinion, not safe to wear due to flammability, but we all know I like to live risky.
As you can see, above on the right, I have a little ephemera problem. I keep everything. If you wrote it, drew it, or made it for me, i have it in a box somewhere. Just ask my husband, who married me and thereby inherited a staggering amount of . . . well, nothing. Notes from class in high school? I have them. Left me a note on my door or car in high school or college? I have it. Doodled me a picture? I have it. Played in a band that i went to see and for which there was a flyer? I might just have it. Ticket stubs? Got’em. I drank beer out of a champagne glass from my junior prom last night. Extra points to the person who guesses the theme. (Hint: The year was 1989.)
So, we’ll start with Homecoming 1987: Crazy for You. Yep, Madonna, from the Vision Quest soundtrack, no less. Can’t beat that with a stick. And I wore the shiny dress. Can’t find the real pictures from that event, and honestly, i can’t remember much about it, except going with David, and we rode with an older guy. It was my first “date in a car.” We were not even out of my neighborhood before someone handed me a beer. I also remember thinking, “Oh, I’m not supposed to drink in cars. What do i do now?” But drink in a car, I did. And from there, we just know it was pretty much downhill. I don’t remember going to the dance at all, but i do remember that night being the first night I ever went to Lon Feldman’s basement. It was not the last time by a long shot.
Next up: Homecoming ’88 – When It’s Love. I can’t make this shit up, people. If you are keeping score, that is one Madonna. One Van Halen.
I went with Shane Nugent. People called him “The Nuge.” I did not call him that. Totally nice guy who was in my homeroom forever. (I was a “P” and he was an “N” – originally, they did homerooms by alphabet, and I was always between John Parker and Alison Peacock, which is how I came to be friends with the Homecoming Queen. After they changed the way they did homerooms, i was no longer with Parker and Peacock, but Shane and I were in homeroom together all four years of high school.) Anyway, I guess he asked me because he didn’t have anyone else to go with – we never dated or anything. I hadn’t been asked, so that worked out well. We went with Jeff Myers and I can’t remember who his date was. We ate at the Italian place in Roswell that for some reason I am thinking Van Halen ate at once? No idea where that came from in my brain, but it is stuck in there, and it would be awesome if someone else remembered that and let me know i wasn’t crazy. That is all i remember.
Oh, and I didn’t totally hate my dress. Blue velvet, with bows on it. I didn’t even hate the bows. Very small bows. Also, silver shoes. I always wanted silver shoes, ever since my mom had a pair in the 70s, and i used them for dress up.
Next: Homecoming 1989. I am pretty sure, based on the picture below, and the timeframe, that this was “In Your Eyes” themed. I went with SLP, just as friends, and it was fun. As mentioned in my comments for yesterday’s post – he was an easy date. No love connection, just two friends who wanted to stay out late and get their drink on. I believe that this was the infamous “wallowing” night, wherein there were many love triangles, and a few of the jilted lovers, myself included, sat around in someone’s unfinished basement (John Sabol’s maybe? Cannot remember) and drank a lot and acted all unlovable and probably listened to The Smiths.
Again, not really an offensive dress. I cannot complain. Gotta love that tissue paper background. Scott looks nice, hair kinda big like i remembered.
This is the piece de resistance, though – Group photo, capturing all of us in our gangliness, all fresh-faced with the world in our hands. Or at least the Atlanta skyline. Obviously need to start with Natalie – She kept AquaNet in business. That is some big hair. John behind her. Me and Scott next to John. Next up, to Scott’s right, are Brant and his date, who was a year younger than us, and for the life of me, i cannot remember her name. Leigh and Mike to their right. Then Matt and Stacy. Front row from left is John B. and I can’t remember that girl’s name either. Also a year younger than us. I remember her being nice. Camille and Duck. What the HELL is in Camille’s hair? Is that a purple bow? Last, but not least, Doug and . . . Carla, maybe? Something that started with a C.
Now, this is a mess of crossed lovers right here. I totally had an ongoing crush on John ever since he moved from Oregon in 7th grade. I used to stare at him in Ms. Stone’s class instead of paying attention to the Wrinkle In Time discussions, which is the only other memorable thing about 7th grade. Now, John and Natalie dated. I think at some point Nat fooled around with Brant, though. Brant and i had just had a recent fling, but then he met Leigh (Mike’s date) and they were all about the young love. I think Mike liked Leigh, too, but really he was in love with Virginia. Not sure why they weren’t together here. Now, I also had dated Matt the past spring, when we were Juniors, but we were still friends. I remember being at a party that fall and we were talking, i think in Mike’s basement (this may have been the fabled “Decant” night, with the fish bottle) and evidently, Stacy’s friends wanted him to ask Stacy out and they finally had to tell me to get lost, which is funny, so that Matt and S. could be alone. If I remember correctly, about this time, John B. also had a crush on me, but it was at the same time that I liked Brant. Well, Brant liked Leigh, but he and I were supposed to go see Hoodoo Gurus together, but then he finagled it so that I ended up going with John B., which was actually kinda fun, but i didn’t like him that way. We had Waffle House on Holcomb Bridge after the show. He later wrote a story and dedicated it to me, and yes, I still have it, because, let’s be honest, how often do you have a boy write you a story, especially one that is actually good? No idea what happened to him, but he was so nice. I guess Camille and Duck were dating? Camille, refresh my memory here. But maybe she had a crush on Mike? Doug and Carla were a “real couple” like John and Nat. No drama there, which is good, because now my brain is hurting.
I really want Nat, Scott, Mike, Matt, and Camille to pipe in with their memories of this night, because I am sure that there is some funny stuff I am forgetting. Pretty hysterical how much this picture jogged my memory of a lot of stuff I had forgotten.
And this is my senior Prom photo: I went with Jason. Jason, what was the theme? How did it feel to go to prom with Cruella DeVille? I don’t know WHAT i was thinking. Am i wearing tan panty hose? That is one hideous dress. Jason, did you get a haircut before this? I think they forgot to cut the back.
Again, drama with the prom here. Jason and i were going as friends, but by this point, I was completely in luuuuuvvvv with Charlie. Charlie was going to prom with his ex, Kristi. Again, I really don’t remember much about the dance (where was it? Downtown somewhere?) other than the fact that I just wanted to be with Charlie. Jason? I KNOW you will remember tons of other stuff.
Okay, enough for today. Matt, I spared you (and myself) the pain of seeing us in the bigass white prom dress Junior year. You owe me.
Will You Go to Prom with Me?
July 30th, 2008
Like, OMG, who wants to go to Prom with me? I know Amanda would go if she was in town. Pierce, would Fowler like to fly in and date me for an evening of Twilight fun?
I have just gotten through the physical torture of not having any Twilight to read, delving into a new, not-at-all-teen-horror-romance-genre-ey (it’s a word, because i just made it a word) novel, On Agate Hill, which, by the way, is really well-written and quite the page-turner at the same time.
But, really, it’s just a case of me biding my time until the new book comes out. Kind of like when you really like that one guy, but he moved, or he isn’t into you, so you date that other, really nice guy in the meantime, but you know that you were never really that into him. Hypothetically. Not that I ever really did that for, like . . . years. The funny part is that if I wasn’t so Twilight-obsessed, I would be really, really jazzed [stef] about this other book.
I so wish I could fit into my old dalmation prom dress. . . that would be perfect. (Okay, haven’t found the dalmation dress, so shiny 10th Grade Homecoming number will have to do for our purposes.)
I’m Pretty Sure This Fits Me
July 29th, 2008Not exactly schizophrenic in the classical sense, but close enough that people give him all the room he needs on the sidewalk.
– Close Enough
At least that’s the way I feel most days.
Cathedral Building
July 28th, 2008Okay, I’m not religious, but I think about God, and I think about my role as a mother, and I often get fed up with the thanklessness and monotony of the job, but I think that after reading this, I am just going to concentrate on the fact that what I’m building isn’t meant to have my name on it, and I wouldn’t really want it to anyway.
I’m not sure if my non-parental friends will get this, but I know that my fellow parents will, and I hope that it will make their jobs easier some days, just to think of parenting as a bit of grand architecture.
Bereft
July 27th, 2008I haven’t been this depressed about finishing a book since I read the last page of A Breath of Snow and Ashes.
Now, what am I going to do with myself for the next five days, thirteen hours, seventeen minutes, and eight seconds until I see Bella, Jacob, and the Cullens again? Ugh.
Maybe my family will be glad to have me back for a few days.